THEME

gaydirectioner:

When I’m listening to Britney Spears in my car and one of my friends tells me to change it

image

51 minutes ago with 45,079 notes Via Source (+)

slenclerman:

webabuser:

whoever created chinese food is my hero

probably the chinese

51 minutes ago with 203,096 notes Via Source (+)

nickcarragay:

isn’t it weird that we have one hand that knows how to do everything and then one hand that just sits there like “I don’t know how to hold a pencil”

54 minutes ago with 712,321 notes Via Source (+)

nataliedormier:

You see, death doesn’t happen to you Lydia. It happens to everyone around you. To all the people left standing around at your funeral trying to figure out how they’re going to live the rest of their lives now without you in it.

55 minutes ago with 5,647 notes Via Source (+)
56 minutes ago with 798 notes Via Source (+)

yourehidingfrommenow:

domdean:

cuntakinte:

I hate playing “never have I ever” because I’m a fucking slut

I hate playing “never have I ever” because I’m a fucking virgin

you will never know which of these two statements reign true for people who reblogs this and that bothers me

1 hour ago with 502,034 notes Via Source (+)
*teacher voice* pick up at least one piece of trash before you leave the room

sorry you’re too heavy to pick up

image

1 hour ago with 149,325 notes Via Source (+)

What’s the chick flick you secretly love?
Oh, The Notebook—easy one. My entire baseball team in high school loved that movie.

1 hour ago with 678 notes Via Source (+)
trillgamesh:


it’s like you’re my mirror

trillgamesh:

it’s like you’re my mirror

1 hour ago with 243,769 notes Via Source (+)
1 hour ago with 1,148 notes Via Source (+)
4 hours ago with 6,574 notes Via Source (+)
squidnapped:

surprise-adoption:

my kind of skyrim

#finally skyrim is playable
4 hours ago with 4,270 notes Via Source (+)

dumbasschronicles:

catesstrophe:

today a dude slammed my finger on accident because he was closing a metal drawer i had my fingers in and i was on drive through and i literally screamed into the headset and the lady just kept ordering her drink as i was trying to hush down three different LOUD MEN SAYING “OH MY GOD WHAT DID HE DO TO YOUR HAND”

she just kept going 

i screamed into a headset and she just kept going

working in customer service

4 hours ago with 46,732 notes Via Source (+)

sassy-rising-angel:

colorfullyfuckedazazel:

genuinewonderment:

sirsquidfish-thefirst:

Do you think that when Steve Rogers sneezes, one of the Avengers goes up to him and whispers, “God Bless America”
Then Steve fucking looks at them like this
image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

image

no IT GOT SO MUCH BETTER TONY’S FACE OH MY GOD

thor’s pokerface

4 hours ago with 85,643 notes Via Source (+)

skyphoi:

image

4 hours ago with 8,748 notes Via Source (+)